Rapid Fire Reviews

During the flight to Africa for our production of "Reap What You Sew," I binged watched several movies while stuck in a plane for over 30 hours.  Instead of giving full reviews for each film, I thought I'd make this a little more fun by giving short expressions on how I felt of each movie.  If you like this rapid fire review and want me to do another one, please let me know!  If there are a series of movies you want me to do for that, also let me know!  Ok, enough context.  Let's review!

The Post:  Tom Hanks as Cranky Old Hanky and Oscar-winner Meryl Streep as Oscar-winner Meryl Streep take on the government through printing newspapers.  And that's about as exciting as it gets.  Great for journalism classes!

Ferdinand:  Do you know the adorable short story of Ferdinand the Bull?  Well, here's an hour and 48 minute version of it filled with extremely loud and obnoxious new characters who tell jokes that an 8-year-old boy told to his buddies at lunch and got a few giggles out of them.

The Shape of Water:  It's like Free Willy, if the boy and the killer whale became lovers.

The LEGO Ninjago Movie:  It's a LEGO movie.  It has laugh-out-loud jokes and gags and a heartwarming message for the kids.  It's not as clever as the original film nor as nostalgic driven as The LEGO Batman Movie, but it did its job--it made me laugh and gave me a fun time.

Blade Runner 2049:  More like "Bored Runner."  There are better ways of lulling yourself to sleep.

Isle of Dogs:  It's a Wes Anderson movie, which means you will either a) find this film charming and funny or b) absolutely strange and awkward or c) play the "Name That Celebrity Voice" game throughout the film and see how many you can get correct before the credits reveal the answers.

Exodus: Gods and Kings:  Ridley Scott offers us a great prequel to his Gladiator film filled with dazzling special effects and epic war scenes and...oh hold on.  I'm being told this is based on the book from the Bible.  For some reason, I don't remember any mention of Moses arguing with an angry little British boy that says his name is I Am in the Bible, nor do I remember Moses holding a sword to Rameses' throat telling him to let his people go.  Yeah, I'm pretty sure this is a prequel to Gladiator.